Wednesday, July 23, 2008

A Jealous Bitch by any other name...

Have you heard the one about the obsessive news anchor who hacked into a co-workers email HUNDREDS of times in a two year period? If you haven't, take a second to answer this question before you read on: Was this hacker a man or a woman?

If you answered a woman, you'd be wrong. This incident happened in Philadelphia and the hack(er) in question is Larry Mendte, formerly of CBS affiliate KYW-TV. According to court documents, he somehow accessed Alycia Lane's email account 537 times between January and May alone! The motive, according to her attorneys, is jealousy over Alycia getting paid more money than Larry. Oh, I believe Larry's a jealous bitch alright. But this kind of ardently psychotic obsessive behavior isn't incited by money, honey. And old Larry didn't stop there. He leaked information from Alycia's private email accounts to a reporter and the resulting story got her fired! This is some 'Gossip Girl' shit!! The story that got leaked was about some bikini snaps that Alycia apparently sent to a married sportscaster, Rich Eisen, who's wife intercepted them and responded with a zippy little email of her own. If you're interested in that story just google Alycia's name. She also got arrested in NYC for punching out a plainclothes female cop (which kind of makes her my hero).

Meanwhile, back in bitch-ville, it's extremely creepy that Larry was so uber-obsessive about Alycia. My gut tells me that this kind of obsession comes from having tasted the nookie once and then being denied access ever again. Looking at Larry though, I can't really see Alycia ever giving him any. She is gorgeous and he is a shmendrick. Although, Eisen - who is described in reports as "handsome" - seems out of her league as well...there's never any accounting for taste. More likely that Larry began lusting after Alycia as they worked side by side, day in and day out. Patient in the beginning because just a smile or her hand brushing his while reaching for copy, was a thrill...but as the years passed and she never looked his way....whatever the case may be, Larry took it all to an icky new level. BTW, memo to Larry; I'd be careful if I were you. She punched out a NYPD cop.

Good Morning America piggy-backed off of this story to trundle out an old piece about email in the workplace and how your Orwellian boss is most likely checking out everything you write on line, including IMs and personal emails. IMing in the office is dangerous. What with all the cute little emoticons you can insert and the instant gratification of being able to bitch about your boss right under their noses...I was once IMing with a coworker about our completely moronic boss and typed "She's a maroon." Thank God I wrote maroon instead of moron because I accidentally sent the IM to HER! Seconds later she called out to me "What's a maroon?" Hey, I just call em like I see em.

So what have we learned today boys and girls? That a jealous bitch isn't necessarily a woman and that your boss better really be a moron....oh and, those Alycia Lane bikini pics aren't anywhere to be found on the internet.

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