Thursday, December 23, 2010

On the 10th day of Christmas...

The Universe gave to me...

Continued opportunities to develop Faith.

What can I say? Faith is my greatest challenge. I'm sure it's a widespread weakness. The one thing organized religion may be good for is the constant dogma of faith. Regardless of how flawed their presentation, they still drum it into the flock. I wasn't raised in faith. In fact, the decoupaged plaque that hung over my mother's kitchen door read "Blessed are those who expect nothing for they shall not be disappointed." Such a bitter bon mot and yet, in it's own twisted way, still a message of faith. Because IF you expect NOTHING you will NOT be disappointed. I unfortunately still live on the razor's edge of dual expectation based on past history. That's the construct we're all dealing with. We have some fluttering expectations that THIS time we won't be disappointed while at the same time preparing for that disappointment because it's what's familiar.

As you can see, my faith muscle is still puny. Atrophied even. I'm struggling to build up the kernel of faith I've coaxed into being...where's a faith Bowflex when you need one?

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