OK, I'll go first...

She couldn't take her eyes off the gown. It had been in the window all spring, yet the shop was never open and the little sign in the window always read "Will return at 11." Whether AM or PM, they never returned. Gold lettering on the doors stated "By Appointment Only" and a phone number. She had left many messages, none were returned. And yet, the shop looked pristine and cared for inside. Lavish gowns and accessories, fit for a princess bride were artfully displayed. Her obsession with the gown had grown to the point where she thought of little else and her trips by the shop had become even more frequent. 11AM, 11PM...11AM, 11PM. Now, as she stood here, waiting for the time on her cell phone to strike 11PM, her heart began to pound. Her mouth became dry. This was it. In 36 seconds, her life would change forever. She'd finally get her hands on the gown...feel the fabric and the weight of it.

She reached deep into her purse and pulled out a baseball glove sized chunk of concrete. Hefted it in her hand, gripping it securely. A quick glance at her phone...as it turned 11PM for the millionth time. With a deep breath, she struck the display window with the concrete chunk. For a second, nothing happened...and then spidery cracks spread with a skittering sound and the window fell at her feet. As she stepped boldly forward to touch the gown, sirens could already be heard heading her way...

Where in the world is Marion Douglas??

For summer I've decided to bring back the cell phone picture journals. The rule is, the pictures have to be taken with my cell phone (which is now a Blackberry Curve rather than Pearl). The twist I'm adding is, you'll have to guess where I am based on the pictures posted. Hopefully this will force me to get out more cuz it'll be pretty boring if all the pictures are of my bedroom! The extra added bonus will be that one of the designated pictures will be a jumping off point to write a short story for anyone who wants to play....

Here we go...Where in the world is Marion Douglas? Post your guesses in the comment section.

Here's a hint: It's in Southern California.

And finally, below is your short story" jump start" photo. The idea is to go with the first thought the image evokes. GO!

I'd love to post your stories too. So send them to me at marion@dangerkittyfilms.com!

When did Bank Robbing become so low rent?

After seeing the trailer for "Public Enemies" with Johnny Depp...a moment of silence...sigh...I really started to think about this. Bonnie & Clyde, Butch Cassidy & The Sundance Kid, The Dalton Gang, John Dillinger, Pretty Boy Floyd, Jesse James, Baby Face Nelson...even the SLA, guest starring Patty Hearst, to name the most famous. Then there were the European counterparts who often pulled off the most dazzling of heists.

And finally, the grand daddy of them all, the great folk hero Robin Hood.

Isn't it funny...peculiar, not haha...that as the "greed is good" Wall St. gang rose, the folk hero robbers disappeared? All those folk hero robbers had something in common, they operated during troubled times in our country. And they had the support of the people. Did they all follow Robin Hood's edict of robbing the rich to give to the poor? I'm not sure and I'm not going to research it. But why were Americans celebrating these criminals? Because they were doing something that every one of us has primally wished we could do at one time or another...stick it the man!

So, while Milken and long line of other "white collar" crooks were ass raping us all, bank robbery kind of fell by the way side...at least in the glamour department. Remember that North Hollywood bank of America shootout in 1997? What a debacle. And zero glamour.

Now, back to my original thought. When did bank robbery become so low rent?


In Paris there's a gang calling themselves The Pink Panther Gang. You can read the full story, written by a pretty hot looking guy named Eric Pape, but here's one of my favorite passages: "Their signature is the audacious, tightly choreographed lightning-strike robbery. In 2005, Panthers in St. Tropez on the Côte d'Azur dressed in loud tourist T-shirts, hit a store near the waterfront, then strolled through the tourist-thronged streets—impassable to cars—to a waiting speedboat. In other well-planned getaways, they’ve used bicycles and even skis." How fun is that?

Currently, it seems Americans have become content to view celebrities and "reality stars" as their folk heroes. But what are they doing for US? Do you care if they have cellulite while frolicking on some exotic beach, or if Jon cheated on Kate? Or if they have body odor or whatever the fuck? I DON'T. How much more uplifting and joyous to read that a modern age Robin Hood and his/her Merry band have arisen. To follow their tales of robbing the very banks that have been fucking us out of house and home, right under our very noses....said noses having been buried in the sand watching "I'm a Celebrity, get me out of here" or "Wipe Out" where obese people bounce cruelly off of gigantic mud covered rubber balls (OK, that IS funny!), but I digress...Can you imagine the satisfaction of learning that a group of robbers have emerged, who have returned to the fine tradition of robbing the rich and giving to the poor? And the earth shaking message that would send to Wall St., the AIGs, the Enrons, the Maddoffs, the Chases, our corrupt government? To borrow from "Network" and that famous Peter Finch line "We are MAD as HELL and we're NOT going to take it anymore!" We don't HAVE to take it...but we CAN actually take 'it", meaning riches from the rich.

I don't condone or advise injuring or killing innocents. But, real good old fashioned, well planned out, elegantly executed robbery. Of huge sums to be distributed to those in need. That's the problem with those Somali pirates. They stupidly withhold the much needed aid for their own people on those pirated ships. That is where they lost sympathy and support. Perhaps, if they read, or watched "Robin Hood" a few more times, they'd get the concept. If they were helping their people (as they originally set out to do), they'd be the folk heroes they should be.

When the Mafia first came to New York, they were adored and protected by the people, because they HELPED those in need. You know what corrupts every single entity mentioned here? GREED.

As Bill Maher so eloquently stated the other night, "Greed is NOT good." It is the Achilles heel of every living soul, excepting those special few who should be studied for what it is that they either have of don't have, that exempts them from greed. You can watch the full video clip but one of the highlight for me was "Americans will do anything to each other for money...who acts like this? This wouldn't happen in Sweden...I can't imagine Abba putting out a record called "Get Rich or die tryin'." So, here is my call - to all similar minded peoples. I am looking for smart, sharp, talented, clever, fearless, resourceful people. Multicultural, multi language, open minded, well read, technically adept, organized, detail oriented, good driving, nerves of steel, cool headed under pressure are adjectives I am looking for. The time has come. Restore the days of real folk heroes. Help us help ourselves. The bankers are still sitting in their rosewood paneled offices, laughing at their government bailouts while still grinding the rest of us under their thumbs like loan sharks. They are bullies and it's time to stand up to the bullies.

Who's with me?

Become an Accessory after the Fact!

Hey whoever reads this! I've added the "Follower" widget to my blog. It takes a second to add yourself and if you're a regular reader, I'd love to know about it. Of course, then again, I could find out that no one is reading and I'll have to take my existential temperature about that!

I've kind of been spending the entire day mired in techno fiddling since I'm giving up old email addresses etcetera, etcetera, etcetera (in the words of Yul Brenner in the original "The King and I"), so this is a part of the fiddling.



The Pinkerton Motto
I've also spent some time becoming more vocal about the debacles currently in California (that extend into other parts of the country as well), meaning Prop 8 being upheld and SAG seemingly incapable of removing it's collective head out of it's collective ass. I swear, and I say this with love (because I do love the actors I have worked with and become personal friends with) if the contract is voted down and they finally strike...I'm going Pinkerton on them. And I won't be alone. I may write more about that later, but now it's back to techno fiddling.

Slavery is not dead in America...it's called "Audience Participation" now

Ah, it is the best of times...it is the worst of times. Actually, it's just the worst of times. Not having worked for six months now since returning from NYC, I have vowed to take whatever opportunities that come along in an effort to create "new activity" and shake up the stagnant "energy" as we say in the newspeak of the language of "the Universe". So, I took my script writing, movie producing ass to Apple One and submitted myself humbly to their tests and agreed to take whatever temp positions came my way. That was over a month ago. I also cross registered myself with every branch in a 50 mile radius only to find that most of them are fighting over the same jobs that are out there. And finally, finally after several false alarms - "We are submitting your resume, along with 10 other applicants, to the client" - for a temp job mind you! Finally, I got a bite. My rep from the Woodland Hills branch called me, breathless last Friday "Marion, I have found you a job in ENTERTAINMENT!"

Wait for it...the gig was to be a PAID audience member of a new game show. The televised version of the apparently wildly popular 20Q - a computer and internet version of 20 Questions. I'm not going to go into the details of the game. You can google or wiki it and find out all about it if you're not already in the know. The only thing that was attractive to me about it...besides the $8 hr pay...was that Cat Deeley is the host. She of "So You Think You Can Dance" fame.

So here's the scoop. Cat Deeley was awesome. She is exactly as warm and personable in person as she appears on SYTYCD. AND she's super sharp, professional and has the patience of a saint. I say this because the production quality of this show was sub-par. Granted, any new show - especially with computer and technical elements, is going to have it's glitches but it took them 12 hours to shoot ONE 1/2 show.

Here's where the slavery part comes in. They loaded us into the lot first - after going through metal detectors and having our bags searched. Then we were ordered to sit on rows of benches and told not to move. Once we were herded into the studio and placed, the warm up guy...and I use the term loosely...put us through our paces. They wanted high energy, enthusiasm, wild applause, loud laughter, hootin' and hollerin'. And they wanted it over and over and over and over again. We were offered no water, no food - aside from some bite sized left over Halloween candy - and were refused bathroom breaks for 5 hours at a time.

The show itself seems awkward and slow compared to the on line or hand held version. Cat Deeley is it's only redeeming quality. Time and time again, she put up with failed teleprompters - which she didn't need because she knew all of her patter by heart. She knew where the cameras were supposed to be, which lighting cues were off...I mean she could have been running the entire show on her own. She never lost her temper, she stood in impossibly high stilettos for hours - all with a smile and kind words for the audience. I'm not sure, but I think the "contestants" might have been getting paid as well - but I can't swear to it. And they were a lame lot...except for the guy who won the final game. A British pastry chef named John who seemed more jazzed about his proximity to Cat than the $20 Grand he won. The final minutes of his play ALMOST made the day worth it. Almost.

I have never been more glad to be released from something than I was Monday night. And I don't care what the universe says...that's activity I can do without. Humbling? Yes. As I sat there surrounded by this audience (mostly background actors, some poor out of work regular folk) who do this regularly, I renewed my resolve to make sure they will always be treated as human beings on any show I'm working on. I will also make sure not to hire anybody that was working on this thing. Except for Cat Deeley, if I ever get the chance. She deserves better. She deserves Ryan Seacrest's career. And I have no doubt she'll get it. But for now, we can all look forward to watching her weave her magic on SYTYCD beginning tonight! Yay!

Finally, I leave you with this to ponder...Working as a truck stop hooker is preferable to paid audience participation...Word!

Something for your Idle Mind

www.procreo.jp This was posted on FaceBook. It's a cool site where you can create a sort of floral garden with your cursor and/or mouse. It's creative which is more than we can say for many time wasting apps.

Please note: the picture above was not created by the listed link. A Japanese artist, Chiho Aoshima, created a whole series of them. This one is called Apricot 3 - A pink dream. To see more of this artist's work go to this link (Galerie Emmanuel Perrotin).

They all have a devilish twist to them which leads me to...

As time goes on, I'm learning that all those sayings we've grown up with...the ones that start with "they say..." are all rooted in good reasoning and age old wisdom. There's a good reason those sayings survive.

One of them being "An Idle Mind is the Devil's workshop". What this has come to mean for me is, if I'm not creating, my mind starts to stir up trouble. Fear, worry, stress - all crowd in and "bedevil" me.

I'm going to try to be even more creative...stay tuned.

MERRY MOTHER'S DAY!

This was supposed to be a Christmas "gift" list that I never finished or published. But they are all still rightly deserved and some have had fabulous and/or unusual updates of their own since this was drafted in December 2008...so here's Christmas is May...


To Lucien, who just finally saw my post about his suspected gay-ness. He's not gay. He's metrosexual. He's a big, black metrosexual man, OK! PS - He has also finally been accepted into his union. Congrats Man! PPS - You are in good manly metrosexual company my friend (LL's pic came up in a google search for "metrosexual")








To Marius, who is human catnip. A steady supply of p**** cats. PS - OR the revelation of a true love that will fulfill you. Use your gift for GOOD not evil ;)










To Renee, who is an angel walking on earth. A lifetime of free wing cleanings. PS - And the renewed joy of nesting.






To Kirstie Alley who went public with her weight loss yearnings because she wanted one more go around on the sexy times track. Someone to fuck you till your eyes pop out, no matter what size you are girl! PS - Since she just went on Oprah, with all the weight back...this goes double now!







To Craig Ferguson who seems to be going quietly mad on late late night. "Saving Grace" is a brilliant movie. You are a funny, talented motherfucker and deserve a MUCH bigger audience. PS - Love the crackpot monkey puppet!




To Lizy, who knows what she REALLY wants but is afraid to go for it. GO FOR IT! PS - I actually don't know what's going on with my friend now. We have drifted apart. But still, whatever you really want, I hope you GO for it.







To H, who has always been exactly who he is. RECOGNITION!










To Arlene, who has a boy in every hood. TRUE LOVE .








To Suzanne, my craziest friend (YES) , MUCH MUCH more laughter and silliness. PS - The goodness you have given returned to you 10 fold.










To Danny, your Mojo back in more ways than one.









To Bianca, EVERYTHING that is your true heart's desire. At the snap of your fingers without any reversals, disappointments, heartaches or let downs.







Merry Mother's Day everyone.